Beginning of love – Part 5.

If you are reading this story(series) for the first time, start from “Beginning of love – Part 1.”

Love letters from my side and just letters from the girl I like because there was no love from her side.  I would still like to call the letters from both the sides as love letters, since I am the writer, I believe I can please myself with some changes.  So love letters it is.

Writing is the easy part, getting the letter delivered to the recipient is the difficult task over here.  You have to keep it confidential, this is like two soldiers, one from India and the other from Pakistan passing secret information and this has to be done without anyone knowing about it.  I was not worried about teachers; they would never believe that the girl I like would ever write to me. She had a reputation like a Nelson Mandela and I was the “Che” Guevara of that place. What is common between these two men is that they bought fought for the country, one won the Nobel Prize and the other was hanged to death, same case here, we both were in love, though with different people but in love.  I was not hanged, but was hated to an extent that a normal person would commit suicide.

So what made me “Che” Guevara? people go wrong for two reasons, If you follow the wrong philosophy, simple, 95 % of the wrong people do this and the other is if you follow the right philosophy wrongly, the remaining  5 % included me.  I had good intentions but would end up implementing it wrongly.

The first letter arrives and won’t you like to know the delivery process?.  The letter was kept in the old geography book of the girl I like, the book was given to her best friend who had no clue about the letter, the same friend who pissed me off with the chess game the other day, she was not supposed to know because she was close to Voldemort.  I had to ask for her geography book of the class I was stuck in as the old text-book was no use to her because she was promoted to the next class. I asked for the book from that good friend of hers, she handed over the book to me. I had to tear open the neat brown paper cover to get the letter.

I am in the class now, I can’t read it over here,  a letter can be recognised from a mile away. I have to go out. I was not patient enough to wait for the final bell to ring. I walked out of the class and rushed to my dormitory. I locked the washroom and here I was reading my first Love letter.

To H,

First, when you are done reading please tear the letter and throw it away.




The remaining part of the letter is confidential but I can assure you that there was nothing romantic in the letter; it was more of a lecture given by Nelson Mandela to Che about how to end the violence and make peace with the world.  It was romantic to me.

I had to write back, it had been a long time holding a pen in my hand, I would get tired after every line, I had to write it neatly, her handwriting was like a printing press, accurate and beautiful.  On the other hand my handwriting was, as if someone had dipped mad insects in an ink bottle and they were left to run across white paper. After my best attempts the letter still looked like as if I just learned writing yesterday.

I had to figure out a way to deliver the letter to her.  How? I needed a messenger, someone I could trust, all my friends had failed and left the school.  I had to do this myself.  I decided to return the book she had given me and in exchange I would ask from some other book next time. The trick worked well for a couple of times. One day Voldemort  came to know about the borrowing of books.

Voldemort : Why are you taking my Girlfriends books ?

Me: She doesn’t need them anymore, so I am just taking them to study .

Voldemort : There are many good students around, you can borrow from anyone.

Me : She is good at studies and willing to trust me with her books. Whats the big deal?.

Voldemort: I don’t want you near her and I don’t want you to have anything that belongs to her.

Me:  I don’t understand whats the problem. It’s just books.  

Voldemort: I don’t like it and I am warning you. Dont dare to go near her.

Me: Okay and you need not warn me and stuff. I will not go near her not because I am scared of you but I don’t want trouble for her.

Voldemort: You don’t need to worry about her. I will manage.

Me: I will do what I feel like. You your way, I go my way.

Voldemort: As of now, you are in my way.

Me: And what are you going to do to get me out of your way.

Girl : What’s happening over here?.

Voldemort: We are just talking.

Girl : When did you start talking to him?

Voldemort : You have to stop giving him your books.

Girl: It’s just books, don’t create a scene over here. It’s not a big deal.

Me: Yes, that’s what I am trying to explain to him

Girl : You will get your books, I will talk to him.

Girl to Voldemort: So you will go around bashing people just because I want to help them. He didn’t ask for the books, I offered him some help. Why can’t you be nice to people. Dont you trust me ?

Voldemort: I trust you but I don’t trust him. You could have informed me about all this.

Girl: And would you let me give the books.

Voldemort: You could have explained the matter, why will I say no.

Girl : I have explained things now. Will you allow me to help him ?

Voldemort: Okay but I don’t want anything more than books. Just books, nothing else.

End of their conversation.

This is how she managed to safeguard our delivery route, next time I would come and give her the books myself with the letter in the cover and she would do the same.

One day I went to her class and asked for her, she was not there, Voldemort got up and said, “Give the book to me, I will hand it over to her when she comes”. I am blank, I can’t say no to him and this book has a letter in it. His eyes had revenge and rage for me, he made me feel uncomfortable. Just like Harry Potter and Voldemort, see the bad guy wont even more but the hero would still feel the aura of negativity around the villain. If he checks it and finds the letter, I am so dead and this would trigger a gang war in school and would also create a lot of trouble for her.  I say, “No, I have come to ask for the other book. I am yet to complete this one. Thanks.” I somehow manage to escape mass destruction.

She still doesn’t love me. She gives me all the happiness which a girlfriend should have given me, but the 3 magic words are missing from the story, not even a hint of them, it is still friendship. Nothing more, she doesn’t say that she loves me or has any feeling but she did make it clear that she feels trapped with Voldemort and she doesn’t really like him. This reassurance of not liking Voldemort was very comforting, at least I knew that I still had a chance and I was not prepared to quit anytime soon.

End to letters. Its mobile time.  How a small gadget changed things.

Letters, friendship, fights.

Click here for Beginning of love – ‘Part 6’.



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